Saturday, January 11, 2014
I just get so haunted by my past........
memories, thoughts, songs, anything sometimes takes me back to how it used it be when I used to use heroin.......God how sad......anyway..... I guess you never really get over it...and you know, I really think like how appropriate, I end up with a guy that has a somewhat alcoholic family--his dad used to drink a lot but stopped, and my bf thankfully seems able to handle drinking, especially now-but like to think like, at some point in the future, who knows what could happen but .......of course I always think it'll be okay for me, whatever.........anyway the point is that I guess I will always be haunted or miss how I used to drink, or still occasionally drink to......escape or remember... or how I used to do other things and somehow...well, I do still miss them..........
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You've taken on quite an endeavour that can often seem daunting at times, and it's for life. In light that, every day you abstain from heroin is an accomplishment.
ReplyDeleteLike any relationship it can take years to adjust to not having that person/thing around anymore. You wonder the streets where you used to hang out with them, relive memories, look for them in places that have become overgrown or wiped away. Melancholy is bittersweet.
It's been over a year since you posted, I hope you're doing well. It would be great to hear how you're going.
mu.
While I hope you are doing well, there is something not quite authentic about your posts.
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