June 15, 2012
I was invited to a friend's birthday party. She attended my birthday party and she was the only one that bought em a give so I thik it's only fair that I go to her party. It's at a restaurant nearby at night. I really have to straighten out my issues with being anti-social. I have always had such a hard time keeping friends, by choice. It's silly because I sit around moping that I don't have any friends and yet I decline each time someone invites me out. This dates back to when I was around 8. My parents used to have to drag me to people's houses when I was invited to parties. Same thing when I was in dance class or swimming class. If I saw my mom, I would leave the class and go sit with her. Sometimes she would have to hide just so I wouldn't follow her around. I was super attached and today I still am. I think that's partially why I complain that my parent's baby me and shelter me. Maybe that's because it's the way I grew up.
Starting at an oddly very young age, I would obsess about being in a serious, long term relationship and that has always been my biggest fears; I fear that I won't find a mature, serious, dedicated man.
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